Monsters
14 years ago
May 28, 2010
I haven't updated this in so long, and I apologize to all one of my readers (thanks mom!). Lots of things have been going on and I wasn't in the mood to write. Recently I had gone through a very downward spiral of depression. Unemployment, the feeling of utter uselessness, I felt like I was using Brandon, and I was afraid that it would only be a matter of time before he began resenting me. I think once that line is crossed, no matter how many jobs I get after that, it cannot be uncrossed. My soul just kept sinking as I felt we were nearing the point of no return. On a whim I applied to a Craigslist posting for a local salon catering to children. They were looking for a part-time receptionist. I sent the owner an email, attached a copy of my resume, and went on to apply for jobs at places like HEB, Petco, Wal-Mart, Target, Wal-Greens, Petsmart, anything. I have also applied for a job I really want, one I won't name here as the place has strict safety and privacy concerns. It is a great job with good pay, great hours and amazing benefits.
As a result of wanting this job so badly, I have gotten in the habit of checking my phone and e-mail every 4 or 5 minutes for a response from them. Low and behold, the salon contacts me instead! I went in for an interview. I think I did well, and my resume is great for a position of this nature, but the owner mentioned that her business is mostly word of mouth and community driven. This was, of course, after *I* had mentioned I just moved here a month ago from Chicago. She mentioned interviewing a lot of people for the position. I left the interview feeling great, but not at all confident that I got the job.
Getting the interview left me with a temporary self-confidence high the helped me get through the next week. But the next Monday I hit rock bottom. I couldn't stay here anymore. I didn't have the strength of mind or heart to continue to be a drain on Brandon. No one was hiring. Even Wal-Mart and Target had 0 open positions. The job I really wanted wasn't calling, and I had (still have) completely lost hope about it. Brandon logged in to chat on his lunch break at work and I broke the news to him: I was unhappy, depressed, and regretted moving here. He was sweet, and he always is, and I love that about him. But, in the middle of our conversation my phone rings. I answer it and VOILA! It was the salon owner. She was calling to let me know I have the job!
I'll write more about my job later (I really enjoy it). But I told you about it so I could tell you about the title of my blog: THE FRIDAY BLAHS! I work today, which is no biggie because my job is fun, and then I am off Sat, Sun, Mon (Memorial Day!). But, despite the 3-day weekend, despite being off every Sunday from now on, I still HATE the weekends!! Why? Because Brandon has to work. His "weekend" is Wednesday and Thursday. So for us "Friday" is actually Tuesday. And today...is actually Monday. So I am suffering from the real-life Friday, but actually pseudo-Monday blahs. (And yes that pseudo is pronounced 'swade-o')
Have a nice holiday weekend everyone!
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